


Mummy and Daddy

by johnedandsherlocked



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Crack, M/M, Parentlock, slight crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-12
Updated: 2013-04-12
Packaged: 2017-12-08 07:42:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/758833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/johnedandsherlocked/pseuds/johnedandsherlocked
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where little Hamish is a bit confused on what to call his parents.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mummy and Daddy

**Author's Note:**

> A weird thing I thought about in class. Maybe a bit crack-y, but who cares?

"Mummy! What's for lunch?"  
The little five year-old jumped onto John, who was apron-clad and ready to cook. He laughed and patted the boy on the head, subtly pushing him away from the knives.  
"It's pasta, alright?"  
"Yay!" Hamish giggled. He started to jump up and down in a circle.  
"Mummy's gotta cook now, and I don't want you hurting yourself again, alright?"  
"Okay," The little boy padded off towards the living room. "I'm gonna go see daddy!"  
"Hammie," John called after him. "Hamish! Don't distract your father if he's busy!"  
"I know."  
The young boy ran up to his father who was sulking again on the sofa.  
"Hi, daddy!"  
"Hello, Hamish."  
Sherlock held his palms together, fingertips under his chin.  
"Are you busy?" The little boy asked.  
"Not really, why?"  
"Because mummy said not to bother you if you're busy."  
"Hmm... Alright, c'mere."  
He set Hamish down on his lap.  
"Hamish," Sherlock asked. "Why do you call me dad and him mum?"  
He pointed to John, who was humming as he cooked.  
"Because," he started. "Because in all my books, the mummy is always smaller than the daddy."  
Hamish grinned.  
"Oh." Sherlock said thinking for a bit. "Well, in terms of our sexual relationship, I'd say I'm the one that you should be calling 'mummy.'"  
John flinched a little in the kitchen, but didn't do anything. Yet.  
"What does that mean?" The curious boy asked.  
"Oh, you know, your mum's the one who's putting his co-"  
From nowhere a pillow came flying at Sherlock's smug face. Hamish giggled as he found the source of the throw: an angry John threatening to throw the knife in his other hand if Sherlock continued any further.  
"Stop that, or I'll kick you out again."  
"You wouldn't."  
"Yes I will." John stated. "Hammie, go play with your brother for a bit. Your daddy and I need to talk."  
"Okay." He grabbed his toys and left the room.  
The sounds of arguing echoed throughout the flat.

"Jamie!"  
"What did I tell you about knocking?"  
Hamish knocked on the door as he passed by it, jumping up on the bed.  
"Daddy says he's not daddy, and he says that mummy's not mummy."  
"What?"  
The boy with the dark curls just like his father's looked up from his book.  
"Why?"  
"I dunno, I didn't really get it." Hamish fidgeted with his toys. His brother put down his book and thought for a moment.  
"What makes a dad a dad?" He asked his little brother.  
"Work!" Hamish exclaimed from his prior knowledge of picture books.  
"Well, they both have jobs, so that's not useful," James explained. "How about something else?"  
"Mums have bigger chests than the daddies!" Hamish said.  
His older brother collapsed onto the sheets. He quickly recollected himself to look at Hamish and tell him that both don't have any because they're men, but stopped for a moment. Sherlock's clothes were always abnormally tight. He sometimes marveled at the strength of the buttons on his shirts. Maybe he was a woman. Just hiding it?  
"Jamie?"  
"What."  
"So is daddy daddy and mummy still mummy?"  
He didn't know what to say, so he just nodded.  
"Okay."  
The two of them walked out of James' bedroom to see if lunch was ready. As they turned the corner to the living room, James jerked his brother back to the corner.  
"What is it," Hamish asked. "Is it lunch yet?"  
"How about we go play Cluedo again?" James whispered.  
"But you hate that game," his younger brother whispered back. "And there's still a hole in it from daddy's knife."  
"Let's just... You know."  
He pushed his brother back to his bedroom. He probably shouldn't let a young child see his parents on the sofa madly snogging each other like it's the end of the world. It was seared into James' eyes. Gross.

"Lunch is ready!"  
Hamish ran to the kitchen while James cautiously walked.  
John's hair was obviously disheveled and he looked rather chuffed, along with Sherlock, whose cheeks were oddly flushed.  
"Here you are." John said handing them a plate of food.  
"Thank you, mummy!"  
"Thanks, papa."  
John paused.  
"What happened to 'mum'?" He asked.  
"Nothing." James blurted, stuffing his mouth with some macaroni.  
John smiled and shrugged. He kind of liked being called mum. It was adorable, and he fancied it. This was quite obviously Sherlock's fault, but he said nothing. He'll pay for that again later.

 

-end-


End file.
